Donkey Punch

November 27, 2007

They hate us for our freedom.

Filed under: Excessive, Hypocrisy, Politics — t4toby @ 2:12 pm

┬áNot our hubris, not our lack of basic respect for the rest of the world, not because of our extreme excesses…


November 21, 2007

Why are fundies so obsessed with Teh Ghey?

Filed under: Gay, Hypocrisy, Politics, Uncategorized — t4toby @ 11:05 am



There is something wrong with that link.

I have to say it. To have a problem with homosexuality, you must not have some kind of filter regarding other people’s business. You’re creative visualization bone has no internal critic.

Let’s think about this. I don’t really try to think about any of my neighbors having sex. Why should it matter what flavor of love they prefer? My conservative neighbors are probably more perverse than my lesbian neighbors. Or not. Who cares?

“Thou dost protest too much, methinks”(to paraphrase of a line from Hamlet)

Get a life!

h/t Bill in Portland, ME

Strap-ya World

Filed under: Diversions, Not Politics — t4toby @ 10:33 am

I am certain that dwelling on the madness warps my brain. So let’s talk Japan. Specifically, Japanese fads.

Evidently, cell phone charms are all the rage in Japan. So naturally, being Japan, they take it to another level:


Wait, what?

Wow, Kewpie is tied up with a cell phone strap string! It’s strange that Kewpie still smiles… He / She likes to be bondaged??

Now that is some fucked up shit right there! Pills? Syringes? Fire? And what is that dude doing under the table!?!

But here’s something that isn’t quite as painful to mull over. Hermetically sealed Plant Cell Phone Charms:

I’m guessing that something in there reacts with oxygen to make CO2. So from almost criminally perverse to pointlessly brilliant. That’s Japan for ya…

November 20, 2007


Filed under: Uncategorized — t4toby @ 4:32 pm

It is right there, gnawing at the edge of my brain. I saw it once, but promptly forgot. It is the reality, the possibility of greatness. Not greatness of ego, but greatness of purposeWe all carry this lamprey along, attached just out of sight behind our eye:

I might just be amazing after all.

The truth that is too frightening to believe:

Out of all the humans in this world, I just might matter.

I have noticed that some of my most talented friends seems to be holding themselves back. I’m not sure if it is habit, fear, or just plain indoctrination; something internal seems to be at play.

So what is it? What is your closet hiding?

What would you find in your hand if you could grasp that fleeting thought?



November 14, 2007

Posted without comment.

Filed under: Homeland Security, Snark — t4toby @ 3:15 pm


h/t eatliver

David Horowitz is an Ass

Filed under: David Horowitz, LOLcons, Politics — t4toby @ 2:53 pm


Picture from Mother Jones, circa 1986.

spanx, Jonathan Schwarz!

The hip cat pictured above is none other than David Horowitz, World Class Ass.

He is the genius behind Islamofacism Awareness Week.

In the above picture, you may have noted his shirt.

I tried to magnify it, but the source material has poor resolution, and my photo sharpening skills are even poorer.

I guess I don’t have trouble with people growing older and wiser. But older and stupider? Come on!

November 13, 2007

Monkey Attack!

Filed under: Monkey Problem, New Dehli, Not Politics — t4toby @ 10:34 am

Looks like things are going awry in New Dehli:

…weeks after the Indian capital’s deputy mayor toppled to his death fighting off a pack of monkeys…

Wait. What?

…the animals are back on the attack, sparking fresh concerns about the simian menace.

This is the capital of India, a country with more that 1.1 billion people.

Along with an estimated 35,000 sacred cows and buffaloes that roam free in the capital, marauding monkeys have been longstanding pests.

Now that is some wacky crap right there.
So there shouldn’t be any problems with animals roaming free in a city of well over 15 million, right?

Trouble boiled over in late October when the city’s deputy mayor, Sawinder Singh Bajwa, 52, fell to his death driving away monkeys from his home.

He was on his balcony reading a newspaper when four monkeys appeared, his family said. As he waved a stick to scare them away, he tumbled over the edge and died in hospital from head injuries.

So I guess its up to the cops to take care of this mess?

As police we’re not experts in dealing with monkeys. We can deal with mad bulls but monkeys are more difficult

Wrong again!

So evidently, this:


Is easier to handle than this:



We’re trying to catch them but the difficulties are a shortage of monkey catchers…

I guess they used their budget up on bull wranglers.

November 9, 2007

Disappearing Act

Filed under: Habeus Corpus, Military Comissions Act, Politics, war — t4toby @ 1:56 pm


I’m not sure this has been discussed enough. The President was given authority, by the Military Commissions Act, to ‘disappear’ you.

The MCA gave the president the authority to declare anyone an “enemy combatant”. Anyone.

This means that if they don’t like your politics, you can go to a black site in some ass-backwards country and be tortured with impunity. With no legal recourse.

This is the bill that the Democrats could not possibly vote against in September of 2006, because every Serious Person in Washington knew that standing up for the Constitution was a losing issue come voting day.

What is happening to America?

November 7, 2007

Fuck Nancy Pelosi. (Updated)

Filed under: assholes, Bush's Democracy, Fuck!, impeach, Politics, sycophants — t4toby @ 11:11 am

Fuck Stenny Hoyer.

Fuck Rahm Emmanuel.

I have nothing but anger and contempt for the ‘Leadership’ of the Democratic Party. Assholes, every one of them.

Fuck DiFi. Fuck Shumer.


I will attempt to parse this into something coherent, but for right now, I would like to personally piss in all of their Cheerios.

I have more respect for the Republican Fascists at this point.

I prefer the wolf that dresses like a wolf. At least I can keep an eye on ’em.

These fucking flabberty jibbity spineless wolves in sheep’s clothing?

Fuck ’em.


Bob Cesca keeps his composure whilst explaining.

He is obviously a better man than I. I have been reduced to a snarling pile of ennui.

November 6, 2007


Filed under: Uncategorized — t4toby @ 10:17 am

I dreamt about mushroom clouds and a B-2 bomber crashing last night. It was way too real. I think I need a break from politics.

I vote this the ‘Best Ad of the Sixties’:


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